Feel the Fear!

I was recently gifted a book from my wife called “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway”, by Susan Jeffers, and quite frankly, it sat on my nightstand for a good three weeks before I even decided to pick it up. I had just finished my 21st nonfiction hiking book and figured “Ok”, I’ll give it try while I cycle and walk on the treadmill in the gym during lunch. I mean it’s not like there is anything positive on the news, as I typically watch the news at the gym to catch up on current events. Also, the next hiking book that I ordered, used, of course, hadn’t arrived yet. So, caught bookless, no excuses now!

Standing at the trailhead of a loop trail in southern Indiana, that I’ve hiked before, I was perplexed with having to make a decision. Do I go to the right again or do I go left this time? I mean, it really is human nature to just go to the right, which I’ve done many times before. Going right feels safe, it’s natural. After all, we drive on the right side of the road, lines typically form to the right, even most of us humans are right-handed. I wonder if it’s different in other parts of the world where they are accustomed to driving on the left and do left handed people typically prefer to go left? Stop, tangent, bring it back. Well, what did I have to lose? The normal decision process focuses on a win-lose scenario, which is limiting. In my new decision-making approach, I look at all decisions as a win-win, no matter what choice I make. If I go right, I’ll be assured to see the beauty of the trail that I’ve seen before. If I go left, I’ll see the beauty of the trail from a new perspective. The decision is made, I’m going right. Just kidding!

While I don’t fear aging or my RA thingy, I do know that I will face some challenges as I continue to mature. My condition can and may impact my overall life expectancy as much as 10 years. Of course, I hope to prove that curve wrong. However, turning 50 this year has brought me to the trailhead of life. In reading “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway”, I have learned that I’ve made a lot of good decisions when it came to my career, and I can honestly say that, in most cases, I felt the fear and I did it anyway. However, the place that I stumbled in my life was growing myself personally and spiritually along the journey. One key area that I struggled immensely with was achieving relationships on a social level, outside of work, and I never got to show the world the true to me, the real me. I was so focused on the pursuit of money and success that making friends outside of work was downright frightening.

So, back to the trailhead of life, I was perplexed with having to make a decision. Do I go to the right and stay the course, or do I go to the left in pursuit of a new adventure? Human nature tells me just to go to the right and stay the course, be safe, stable, and secure. The decision that I’m now faced with is not a win-lose. If I go to the right, I’ll be sure to live out a safe and secure life, at least financially. I mean, even though I’m a bit messed up, knowing that is half the battle and I continue to work on improving that. I have a career and life is good. If I go to the left, I’ll still be sure to live out a safe and secure life and I can still spend the time to work on myself spiritually, find myself and show the world the true me. I’ll have an adventure, and life will still be good. The decision is made, I’m going right, NOT! Left is my clear path to living the best life and being the best version of myself possible.

I know I’m a little cryptic about the choice to go left in life, what does it all mean? I guess you’ll just have to wait, and I’ll explain it all soon. I’m super-freaking excited…to feel the fear and do it anyway. Be_again!